We all have blind spots (aspects of ourselves we aren't fully conscious of). Therefore, often we rely on our close friends and family to be our mirror, to tell us what we’re not seeing. And it can be hard to hear that perhaps we act selfishly at times or maybe we’re not supportive partners, or bad listeners.
In confrontational situations, be it an argument with your partner or a misunderstanding with a stranger, the tendency is to place blame on the other party, instead of first taking responsibility of our own errors and wrongdoing. I mean I’m the number 1 culprit of this. 😂😂😂
But what we should be doing, is TAKING A LOOK IN THE MIRROR. What actions have we taken that have led to this situation. What could we have done better?
My partner came up with this brilliant analogy for a functional relationship.
Say you and your partner are playing a game of volleyball, but he or she is off their game, they’re not playing well. In order to WIN the game, you are going to have to STEP UP. Just for today, YOU need to be better, to make up for their momentary weakness. And if you give it your all, you might just inspire or motivate your partner to be better too. Only this way, will you win the game (the game being a healthy and happy relationship).
You see, to have a successful relationship to need to think in terms of the TEAM. And stepping up to support your partner in his/her hour of need is precisely that - team thinking.